HOw to cope through the holidays

This is the most wonderful time of the year, right?

As amazing as the holidays can be for many people, they can cause a lot of anxiety and sadness for many others.  The anxiety can actually become worse because of the expectations that the holidays "should" be the most wonderful time of the year.

When someone is suffering from an eating disorder, depression, anxiety and/or grief, holiday traditions can be agonizing--- between social gatherings, holiday food, extra time with family, shopping, extra expenses, etc.

Here are some tips to get through the holidays this year

1.  Talk to someone

Have someone that you can lean on during this time.  Hopefully you have at least one person that knows about your struggles that you can call and be honest about how you are feeling.  It can be extremely helpful to talk to that person before a holiday gathering and create a plan of action- try asking that person if you can talk to them (text, call, mesage) to help talk you through the challenges.

2. If it is possible, bring a supportive person to the holiday gathering

What is even better than messaging? Actually having the person there to help you. It can be scary to ask the person to come with you, but wouldn't you go to a holiday gathering to help a friend?

3. Create an escape plan with your supportive person

If the gathering becomes to stressful, call your support person and practice your escape plan.  It could be as simple as a code word that means you need a break and need to go for a walk.

4. Breathe 

Remember to breathe deeply when your anxiety hits.  It can help to count your breaths or have a mantra.  Try practicing now- breathe in for 8 seconds, pause at the top of your breath and breathe out for 9 seconds, again pausing at the end of your breath, then repeat.  

5.  Practice anxiety reducing affirmations/mantras/coping statements

Try to find a mantra that fits for you and repeat it to yourself when you get anxious

I am okay
I am calm
I am exactly where I need to be right now
I am relaxed
I can do this
This will pass
I can be anxious/angry/sad and still get through this
I have done this before and survived, I will survive again
All anxiety passes
This will not last forever
Right now, I am not in danger, right now, I am safe
It is okay to be anxious/sad or angry. It is what I do with the emotion that matters

6.  Practice visualizing yourself in protective bubble

Many people have dysfunctional families and the thought of extra time with extended family members can cause an increase in anxiety.  If you have difficulty being around family members, practice visualizing a protective bubble of whatever calming color you choose.  The bubble protects you from any negative energy from others and surrounds you with calming energy. 

7. Memoralize lost loved ones

If your holiday sadness and or anger is due to grief, memoralize your lost loved one.  Many people try to ignore memories of their loved ones, as the grief can hurt too much.  Even though it may work in the short term, the grief will build and can result in physical and mental illness.  Try to reach out to another person that knows your lost loved one and talk about positive memories of him or her.  Look through old photos and allow yourself to feel any emotion that comes up. 

Wishing you happy holidays!
Please take good care of yourselves and be kind to others.  

-Ashley